Could really use this dead space for some venting. Everything's screwed up. I screwed up, he screwed up, and that screwed the whole thing.

You know people say that you could give & take. But what you give sometimes is a little too much patience? That's when things get out of proportion. He'd probably say that I've not given, or only have been taking. What's it that I'm taking, exactly? I have no clue.

What I've been giving? The patience towards the same, recurring problem. I've never demanded that action to be stopped, but yet he said he would. Maybe I was naïve to believe or to think that he already stopped. So it all came crashing down when I saw it was there, all along, never gone. What could I do? Watch, keep quiet.

The breaking point came when I thought through it all, again and again. I just couldn't except it. And when I confronted him about it, all I got was 'it has become a lifestyle for me.' All I could think was that he had to make a choice: the lifestyle or me. It's a tough choice, but from what I felt, he couldn't be sure. He said he was, but I don't think so. 'So this isn't a love that knows no bounds?' Yeah. It is.

So now that we're here, both, left lurking deeper into the waters. My only compromise wasn't good enough. Right now, I have no idea what's gonna happen within these 2 weeks, how it would turn out, or if these 2 weeks are even going to help cause I don't think 2 weeks is necessary to solve this. I am honestly, lost and scared. What would we become?

These are supposed to be the 14 happiest days since we've come this close to the mark of one. But I doubt it will be.

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